Friday, October 20, 2017

Woodcreek Blog #3

23 September 2017

            Well I’ll be a monkey’s uncle, it kind of worked.  I just got finished rubbing fresh lemon all over my feet in hopes that I will be able to get to sleep tonight.  From the waist down, I’m covered in fierce bug bites…but they’re mostly on my feet.  The thin skin.  When I awoke this morning to this discovery, I knew immediately that my life as I knew it was over.  Bed bugs.  Bed bugs are a real thing up here, a big problem.  You have to sign paperwork about them when you sign a lease.  There are signs in the subway warning you against them.  The super of my building is as good as useless (that’s an entirely different story), therefore the only solution to my problem is lighting a match to my place and walking away. 
            After comparing bug bites on Google images, it turns out they’re likely mosquito bites.  Calm down, Courtney.  But why did they bite me in my sleep?  The window in my bathroom stays permanently open at the very top, it’s about a 2-inch gap, because there is no fan.  There is also a small gap in the window screen in my bedroom.  Is my meat really so sweet that these mosquitoes are travelling from far and wide, bypassing literally millions of other people, to work their way into the all-you-can-eat buffet in my loft bed??  Or is it one giant, super-mosquito that has plans to ravenously feast on my blood night after night, gaining strength and bulk, until he can walk through the front door of my apartment and take over the world? 
            I can’t shut the windows.  Despite this having been an incredibly mild end of summer up here, if I shut the windows I would perish.  Central air is for the disgustingly rich and famous.  Yes, I have a cute little window unit that I bought for my other bedroom window.  He tries, the poor little fella.  I mostly just use it for the fan.  I shudder to think what my life will be like in the dead of summer next year.  I feel sticky just thinking about it.  Needless to say, I cannot shut the windows.  So I just fill in the gaps with towels, put on full pants and socks, and cross my fingers that I don’t wake in the morning resembling a pubescent teenager with dots all over my face. 
            It’s amazing to me, that I was able to purchase the lemon at 1 o’clock in the morning anyhow.  There is a produce stand and the end of my quiet little block that seems to be open 24 hours.  Meaning a man just pulls his hat over his eyes while he tries to catch some Zs in a chair.  The walk to and from work today made me question if life was worth living.  The bites are on all the surfaces of my feet.  Each step, in my shoes and socks, igniting an insatiable flame. The guy who runs the pet store on corner is the one who told me the lemon trick.  I stopped in after work to buy more cat food and left an hour later.  It’s always an ordeal, buying cat food.  His name is Mic, short for Microphone, and he is from Jordan.  His dad obviously put a lot of thought into it when he named him.  Microphone is such a nice, traditional Arabic name.    Mic is a nice guy.  He’s an incredibly weird guy, but nice.  He told me a couple weeks ago that whoever ends up with me is one lucky fella.  That my smile could brighten the darkest days and that my positive energy radiates all around me…or something along those lines.  It was a beautiful thing to hear during this emotional journey.  He has a thick accent and he talks really fast.  He went on to say that he believed my spirit is the spirit of his dead best friend.  Sigh.  It was still really nice.  Today he gave me a gorgeous lavender rose for my birthday, and counseled me on my bug and super problems.  He actually knows my super and he gave me his apartment number so I can just go knock on his door at any hour of the day, should I need him.  ::Maniacal laugh::
            I’ve been in my apartment for 3 weeks now and I still don’t have anywhere to put my clothes.  It still looks like a natural disaster in here.  It’s hot in here.  My feet itch.  My hips are sore from all the walking.  My cat is throwing up everywhere.  My new job kinda sucks.  (There’s no place like Woodcreek.  ::clicks heels 3X::) Travelling short distances takes an eternity.  I can’t play loud music because – neighbors.  I can’t use my microwave and my teakettle at the same time without tripping the main breaker to half my apartment.  I’m legally required to rinse and sort my garbage.  I don’t know if I’ve ever been this happy.  The energy of this city is incomparable to anywhere I’ve ever been.  It’s far too expensive to sustain life, but it’s amazing.  I want to do all the things, all the time. 

Don’t look up,

Courtney

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